Groomed For Leadership
All I know I learned from my horses
By Shannon Coates
I’ve never heard an effective leader say that leadership is easy—it’s not. In fact, it can be incredibly difficult at times. Not only does an individual in charge have to make sure the day-to-day needs of an organization are met, but he or she is also responsible for helping each person become the best contributor possible—all while continuing to learn and grow and manage the goals and objectives of the department.
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While leadership can often feel like herding cats, it is my horses that have taught me the most important lessons about being a leader. Horses are prey animals. They live in herds. As such, their survival depends on social systems and herd dynamics, as well as on their ability to read and interpret non-verbal communications and body language. Their ability to read situations and emotional energy correctly and convey information to the herd is critical to the herd’s survival. Horses are incapable of lying. They mirror our energy—good or bad. For these reasons, horses can provide immediate feedback to humans regarding behavior.
I have been fortunate to spend a lot of time around horses. As a child, I thought I was just having fun, enjoying nature, and learning to ride. Now, as an adult, I realize each horse I encountered taught me an important lesson and contributed to the leader I am today. Below are five lessons I learned.
1. Be aware.
One morning last fall, I went out to the barn to feed my two horses, Luke and Beamer. I was running late and needed to get to work, so I wasn’t paying attention to anything other than putting feed in their buckets and moving them into their stalls. After dumping the feed, I went to get them. As soon as I took one step outside the barn, I knew something wasn’t right. Both horses, normally easy to catch, were laser-focused on something about 200 yards away. Neither would come when I called. I stood in the pasture watching but couldn’t see or hear anything. After about 30 seconds, a family of deer emerged from the tree line, bounding across the field and into a neighboring property. The three of us stood there mesmerized. After the deer were gone, the horses turned and walked to their stalls on their own. I would have missed that amazing experience if I had made either of the horses move before he was ready, or I hadn’t been aware enough to realize they knew something I didn’t.
The takeaway: By nature, most leaders are highly competitive and move quickly. It can be easy not to “see” what is right in front of us. Remember to be present and aware. In fact, you as a leader must be hyper-aware of your surroundings to obtain the information you need to make good decisions for the team. If you never stop moving, if you are always over-booked, you may miss these opportunities and make decisions you will later regret. Don’t be afraid to stop or say “no.” It makes you a stronger leader.
2. Communicate clearly.
Horses are large animals (many of them weighing 1,000 pounds or more) that can be pushy with each other and with their owners. It is critical they understand boundaries and rules set by their humans and by each other. As herd animals that rely on their leader for survival, there is nothing more important than clear communication. Their lives depend on it. Laramie, our newest addition, is clearly a leader—an alpha. She is not afraid to tell Luke she is the boss. Sometimes this is done by the flick of an ear or the shake of her head. Other times she will chase him. Regardless of the method, her communication is clear and concise. Because there is no confusion about the message, Luke is confident and accepting. He knows exactly what is being asked of him.
The takeaway: As leaders, it is important to understand we are constantly communicating with our team, whether we realize it or not. While most people rely heavily on their words, the tone used to communicate the message and a person’s body-language are much more impactful. For example, if a team member asks, “How are you doing?” and you scream, “I am fine!” while slamming a door, what is the real message you are sending?
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3. Lead consistently.
As a horse owner—the leader of my herd—it is important to be consistent every time I interact with them for their safety and mine. Because summers are so hot in Texas, my horses spend their nights outside when the sun is down and the temperature is cooler, and then they come into the barn during the day to escape the heat. Every morning when I go to get them, Laramie comes in first with Luke following closely behind. One time Luke was closer to the barn entrance than Laramie, so he started walking in. After a brief scuffle, with me almost in the middle, they went to the wrong stalls with the wrong feed. Luckily, nobody was hurt, and I was able to change switch the buckets, but it was a good reminder that consistency is important. That situation could have ended badly.
The takeaway: As a leader, it is important to be consistent with the team to create a safe environment. Consistency builds trust, which allows the team to be actively engaged in what the members are doing. It also allows room for employees to grow by asking questions and taking calculated risks.
4. Control emotions.
One day I arrived home and found Beamer lying on the ground with part of a wire fence stuck between his hoof and shoe. He must have been rolling too close to a neighbor’s fence and got stuck. He lifted his head to look at me, but made no effort to get up. When I realized what was wrong, I started to panic. What if he tried to get up because I was there? What if he did and broke his leg? What if he had been down so long he couldn’t get up? I took a deep breath. He let me walk around him and assess the situation. He was so calm that he helped me remain calm. I knew there was no way I could free him without having something to cut the wire. The problem was the wire cutters were in the barn at the back of the property and we were near the front gate. I was afraid to leave him in case he tried to get up and follow me. I didn’t know what to do. Luckily, my husband, who always carries a knife, drove in as I was weighing my options. He was able to loosen the shoe so the wire could slide out. Beamer didn’t struggle at all while we worked to free him. He raised his head occasionally to check our progress but knew we were helping him. He trusted us. When he was free, he got up, shook himself off, and walked away like nothing ever happened.
The takeaway: Don’t panic! As a leader, you will face many “scary” situations. Remember to remain calm, so you can evaluate what is happening and make a sound decision. Understand that your emotions impact the team for better or worse. Don’t be afraid to acknowledge you are unsure or afraid, but make sure the team knows you will get through the situation together.
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5. Change is hard.
My husband and I said goodbye to our 24-year-old gelding, Beamer, on January 28, 2023. He had been struggling with health issues that eventually forced us to make the difficult decision to let him go. His stablemate, and best friend, Luke, was heartbroken. They had lived together almost their entire lives and were bonded. Beamer was the alpha of the two, so when he was gone, Luke was lost. He ran around frantically looking for Beamer and whinnying at the top of his lungs for almost a week. There was nothing we could do to comfort him. It was heartbreaking. Although I wasn’t ready, we knew we had to find another horse for Luke. After several weeks of searching, we found a yearling, Laramie, and brought her home. I’ll never forget how excited Luke was to see her get off the trailer. Although they reacted well to each other, as herd animals they had to determine who the leader would be. Laramie has earned that role. It is amazing to see how bonded they are in only a few short months. When you look out in the pasture, you will never see one without the other.
The takeaway: As leaders we are responsible for making difficult and sometimes unpopular decisions that may push us and our teams out of our comfort zones. This is usually easier for some of our teammates than others. While change is sometimes needed for growth, it is important to communicate clearly with the team before, during, and after the change being implemented to help ensure success.
I am so grateful for everything my horses have taught me over the years. Without their lessons, I don’t believe I would be the leader I am today. Leadership isn’t easy, but it’s worth it.
Shannon Coates, Ph.D., MBA, CPRE, is the Director of the city of Frisco Parks and Recreation Department in Texas. Reach her at scoates@friscotexas.gov.